Have you ever felt like you were fumbling along just trying to figure things out and hoping for the best? Like you don’t know what the heck you’re doing. Parenting is a lot like that, or taking a leap of faith without a net.
In a previous blogpost, What to do when you feel stuck in the weeds I covered some tips to help get you through those times when you feel unfocused, overwhelmed, or unsure you’re on the right track.
That’s what I call being in the weeds. The tips:
- Stay flexible
- Connect with people who’ve been where you are
- Find a process that works for you
- Trust the process
Getting input from others is great, but there comes a time when you have to decide for yourself your plan of action. Ask yourself: What do you want, what will you do, and how will you do it? You have to decide come up with a plan of action.
But how do you decide?
If you ask five different people how to do something – write a book, lose weight, get in shape, plan a trip, find a new job – you’re bound to get five different answers. Some writers outline every scene before writing a single word. Others start writing with a simple idea. Do your research to help you find a process that works for you.
Do your research to help you find a process that might work for you.
One of the things I did when I started writing my novel and had committed to writing my novel was to look for people who had successfully navigated through the shaky period of getting started, who had been where I was. I wanted to learn from their experience. (See previous blogpost on Connecting with people who’ve been where you are
You know it’s possible, but it’s hard to know what that would look like if you’ve never done it.
Consider your starting point
If you want to start running but you have no idea what to do, you’ll need to find a program that starts with the basics. Or if you know you’ll have to start with walk-run intervals, find a training program that starts there.
Are you the type of person who learns by watching? A video might be the best resource for you. Do you prefer having a reference guide? Look for a book that gives you a step-by-step to follow.
If you’re the type of person who gets overwhelmed by lots of detailed and technical information, look for resources that seem to understand you want to incorporate this new thing (running, cooking, writing, etc.)
Maybe you like a more personalized approach. Look for a personal trainer or coach who can give you 1-1 attention and hold you accountable.
Tailor the process
In the training scenario, if you mix running days with cross-training days because otherwise you get bored and will nix the whole thing, then mix it up.
Or let’s say you’re getting tips from a friend about how to de-clutter your home. Some particular things she recommends or would day a particular way may not work for you because of circumstances, resources, tools, etc.
Adjust her recommendations to fit your needs instead of making excuses and saying, “Oh no. That’ll never work.”
There’s rarely a cookie cutter solution that works for everyone.
Be open to making adjustments if what you planned isn’t working like you thought it would. Remember that a little flexibility goes a long way. Stick with it and don’t give up.
When I say process, it really means the way you approach a task. It doesn’t happen all at once. We have to be patient and take it a little at a time. A baby doesn’t normally run before he can walk.
If we want to get stuff done it helps to be open to being patient, learning all we can, following the steps, and adjusting accordingly.
That’s the key to finding a process that works for you and that’ll help you stay on your path to success.